Ben Crystal: Control THIS, gun grabbers!

Ben Crystal: Control THIS, gun grabbers!

By Ben Crystal The gun-grabbers could have gone completely squirrel-monkey insane. Following the carnage which unfolded in Sutherland Springs, Texas, they could have turned the victims into sock-puppets for their gleeful virtue-signaling. They could have responded to Devin Patrick Kelley’s evasion of the myriad laws designed to prevent his atrocity by immediately demanding all sorts […]

Ben Crystal: Next time, just go with sharks with laser beams on their heads

Ben Crystal: Next time, just go with sharks with laser beams on their heads

By Ben Crystal Election 2016 featured all the benchmarks of a secret agent yarn. Campaign officials and political party flacks conspired with Russian agents to rig the 2016 U.S. presidential election. There were secret meetings in Moscow, wiretaps, shady document exchanges, payoffs and even a really twisted sex scandal. Turncoats operating at the highest levels […]

Ben Crystal: Killing Sergeant Johnson

Ben Crystal: Killing Sergeant Johnson

By Ben Crystal According to Rep. Frederica Wilson (D- Awesome Hats), President Donald Trump told the widow of Sergeant La David Johnson, who, along with three of his fellow soldiers, was murdered by Islamic terrorists in Niger, “He knew what he signed up for … but when it happens, it hurts anyway.” According to Trump, […]

Ben Crystal: How Harvey dooms the Democrats

Ben Crystal: How Harvey dooms the Democrats

By Ben Crystal Ex-Miramax honcho Harvey Weinstein — patron of the arts, promoter of progressives, mentor to movie stars and Democratic Party ATM — is also a blue-ribbon-at the-4-H-show-class pig. That’s right, one of the most powerful people in an industry which is dominated by, and perpetuates, every ugly stereotype imaginable, is a real-life avatar for […]

Ben Crystal: Shooting blanks

Ben Crystal: Shooting blanks

By Ben Crystal I started this column as a Facebook post. I intended to debunk the myths, lies and fetishistic fantasies liberals have developed about guns and gun rights. A few thousand words into it, it occurred to me that doing so would end up burning more bandwidth than live streaming the next Big Sandy […]

Ben Crystal: The Trump (Obama, Bush) Doctrine

Ben Crystal: The Trump (Obama, Bush) Doctrine

By Ben Crystal I suppose President Donald Trump’s last Tuesday address to the United Nations General Assembly constituted the official debut of the Trump Doctrine. And I suppose it’s fair to say the Trump Doctrine is exactly what I expected it to be. The president made it abundantly clear that he will be approaching foreign […]

Ben Crystal: What happened, Hillary?

Ben Crystal: What happened, Hillary?

By Ben Crystal Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign retrospective, What Happened, will cost you around $20. To me, the idea of forking over $20 or so on 500 pages of the worst presidential candidate in modern history blaming everyone but her wardrobe assistant(s) for her humiliating defeat seems sillier than thinking that dressing like Dr. Evil’s older […]

Ben Crystal: Hurricane high heels

Ben Crystal: Hurricane high heels

By Ben Crystal It goes without saying that America — indeed, the world — would be a better place if disasters like Hurricane Harvey and its attendant devastation never happened. You’d have to be pretty much devoid of a soul to celebrate the images of devastation and death pouring out of Texas. However, it is possible to […]

Ben Crystal: Wide left

Ben Crystal: Wide left

By Ben Crystal Last Wednesday evening, demonstrators crowded the NFL offices in Manhattan to demand — DEMAND — that Colin Kaepernick be signed by one of the League’s clubs, posthaste. Despite their commands, Kaepernick, who hasn’t suited up for an NFL squad since he walked away from the San Francisco 49ers in March, continues to watch league […]

Ben Crystal: The hard truth

Ben Crystal: The hard truth

By Ben Crystal Some truths are harder to face than others. But truth isn’t as fluid a concept as — say — “gender identity.” Read on; there’s something in here for everyone. Hard Truth: James Fields is a terrorist. If his name was Muhammad, and he’d driven his car into a crowd in Nice, I’d […]

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